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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Lies of Shame

DOMINATION. The Walks don't play. After a 40-0 victory over Candy Van, WoS marches on to bye week after bye week, after bye week, after bye week....As a matter of fact, I don't think the Walks have another game until 2013 with this schedule. 

Back to the game at hand though. Ryan led off with a 3-run homer (yes, it happened) and was followed by a solo shot by Alex, a double by Tanker and a grand slam by Andre, despite having only one man on base. Things went on like this for five innings, only stopping to pity the poor Van. It was an incredible offensive power display all 45 minutes long until Candy Van's hapless captains pulled a Roberto Duran and said, "NO MAS! Having played on the field you graced with your presence was just as good as a win!" The Walks didn't agree with that statement, but shortly thereafter, made Lundy's dreams come true when they took their talents to Ego's. 

This week the Walks will be hitting the weights, bulking up for what will either be a long playoff run, or no playoff run at all due to a forfeit since 37 players have already RSVP'd as a "no." It's ok though because even Luis knows that the rest of the league is playing for second place. Sorry TX Live, you guys simply cannot compete with us. Here's some advice. You won't be able to beat us if you're dressed on the kickball field in the same shorts you wore to see your favorite garage band play at SXSW. Take off those tight ass denim shorts. It's not sexy, funny, or attractive. It's also really hot outside and your dick stinks.

Since only one game is on the schedule from now until August 27, the rest of the league won't have a chance to see the Walks game, but I'm quite sure they'll be making a strong showing at the bar anyways. 

Until then,

On a personal note from Tanker: Thanks to everyone in WAKA for the past year. I will now be bored to death on Thursdays...Skype me in! I hope to see everyone either in Vegas or next year, but in the meantime, would SOMEBODY please take down Relax while I'm gone?

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