The WAKA Shame and the Hookup Waiver
Similar to the Walk of Shame, the WAKA Shame is a common occurrence the morning after kickball and is easily identified by the fact that you are wearing your kickball t-shirt and gym shorts from the night before. The WAKA Shame is most often followed up by calling in sick to work.
This phenomenon has the potential to cause some uncomfortable situations, especially if it happens too early in the season. We here at the GMOT are fully in favor of a drama free environment so we had our crack legal team* work up a document that should help you if you ever find yourself in a situation that could lead to a WAKA Shame.
Our crack legal team also suggests that any conversation that has the potential to lead up to a WAKA Shame should start off with, "Hey there. So, you want to sign a waiver with me?". Hopefully this document can help you get through any possible uncomfortable situations that may result from your WAKA Shame.
The Hookup WaiverUpon signature of this document both individuals involved in a hookup hereby agree to the following stipulations:
This waiver shall be considered legally binding and any violation of this waiver shall result in legal action in a court of law.
- Parties agree to not be bothered if the other party does not call or contact them in any way.
- Any contact that is made shall be conducted over text messaging or in person at the bar during last call with the sole purpose of instituting another hookup.
- Additional hookups shall not be expected, anticipated or looked forward to and should only happen in instances of spontaneity when neither party can find anyone better to hook up with.
- Both parties agree to not be bothered if either party chooses to ignore the other, spend time with other parties or hook up with other parties.
- Both parties agree to be discrete and act as if nothing ever happened while in the presence of other non-involved parties.
- Details of the hookup shall not be discussed with teammates or anyone else you may ever see near a kickball field, kickball sponsor bar or anywhere else that kickballers may be found.
**This document is not legally binding in any US State, US Territory, Commonwealth Nation, Nation recognized by the UN or any other place on Earth. Use at your own risk.
Captains, please be responsible and be sure to print out several copies and keep them with you at all times. It is important to have this document on hand for use by your team members when they most need it.
*We can not verify that our legal team is, in fact, a team of attorneys but they do wear suits. Ok, so the suits are old and ratty and smelly. In fact, our "crack legal team" is actually just some crack heads but they were hanging out near the courthouse so it is entirely possible that they were either at one time attorneys or at least have some inside knowledge of how our legal system works.