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Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Robotkicks

If there's one question I've often considered, it's this: Can Robots Play Kickball? (Yes, I said often considered. But I also think a lot about robots. Too much, probably...) But if you're like me and wonder if Robots can play kickball, wonder no more! At the end of this entry, you will be convinced that yes, our mechanical brothers and sisters can, and will, succeed in WAKA. And they'll look shiny doin' it.

Top 5 Reasons Why Robots Kick Ass at Kickball
5. They won't let emotion hold them back from total annihilation. Just ask the boy who couldn't cry.
4. You can program them to win. If they're programmed to win, all they'll do is win because it's all they know.
3. Consistency, consistency, consistency. Every kick/play they make will be text book. There might be a small margin of error, but it's minimal in comparison to humans. And just think about how awesome they'll be at flip cup with that level of consistency!
2. Strong, Enduring, terror-inducing, loveable: If I've learned anything from watching Battlestar Galactica, it's that robots can evolve and be very versatile. They also can trick humans into falling in love with them and take bad ass shots with rocket launchers.
1. Robots make fun drunks, even when belligerent. Case in point: Bender.

This week: Robotkicks v. Purplesaurus Rex. The Future Villian v. The Extinct Villian. Lundy "The Fanny Pack" v. Esteban "The Cargo Shorts." When you're making your bets on who's going to win this match, keep this in mind: cargo shorts are NEVER the answer.

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