After a tough loss in their first contest as a team, the Dillon Panthers gathered around Captain Becca Henken for a post-game wrap-up. Knees were bloodied. Pitching arms were sore. Beers were spilled. Spirits were low. Captain Henken, reminded of a time when another new team* had suffered an early defeat before rising to greatness gave the following speech:
‘I wanted everyone’s friends and family to be in here to hear this, gentlemen and ladies. I have never been more proud of a kickball team than I am right now. I am in awe of each and every one of you gentlemen, and ladies. (Long dramatic pause) You played average to above average kickball tonight. This is the game that people are gonna talk about for years to come. This is the game you are gonna talk about. There’s not a single person in this room that’s ever gonna be the same. You be proud of yourselves. Because gentlemen, and ladies, you are champions.’
Second base-woman Christine Fallon was a little confused by this speech. She was confused because there were no friends and family around, and she was confused because she was fairly certain people would not be talking about what had been a rather uneventful kickball game for years to come. Mostly, she was just confused because she had never seen NBC’s nonfiction documentary, “Friday Night Lights.”
Fallon was certainly not the only one on the team who hadn’t seen the documentary, and for those who hadn’t, this post-game speech understandably came off a little weird. For those who had, tears wet the dusty ground of Gettis Park.
Next week, we will be sure to introduce the Panthers and let you find out a little more about your 2011 league champions. Until then, always remember:
Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose.
* Ok so in that case it was the East Dillon Lions and not the (West) Dillon Panthers. It was still Coach. Cut me a break.