It's been two weeks since I last played kickball, and the Bachelors still have another interminable week left to endure before our 2 consecutive bye week banishment is ended. Due to the hiatus we have a complete lack of kickball related news to share, except for this tidbit: we have not won a game, have scored no runs whatsoever and haven't even been on the field in two weeks, and yet Jay's power polls have us at #5. How is this possible? One word: gravitas. You can't look upon a collection of athletes as skilled and talented as the Bachelors without being awed to silence.
In scheduling our two byes at the beginning of the season nothing has been accomplished but a delay of the inevitable. We are not withering, we are not getting rusty. Like Edmond Dantes in the Chateu d'If we've spent our weeks in the prison of no-kickball educating ourselves on every nuance of the game, honing our skills to inhuman levels. Our return is imminent.