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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Untitled Kickball Project

First, UKP is in deliberations now to produce a new team name.  Consistency has it's merits, but those arguments don't hold water when we're a 2nd round exit every season, and there have been grumblings for a change.  Look for a new moniker in week 2 but until then, UKP it is.

The Project has finally begun to utilize the farm system it's had in place since it's inception, as the first group of recently graduated UT rowers have joined our ranks.  One might say, "Hey Stephen, aren't rowers notoriously bad at ball sports?" to which I would respond "Eat my butt."  We strive to disprove negative stereotypes here at UKP and I'm disappointed in your bigoted views, hypothetical heckler.  We're programmed for winning, and that's what's important.  How many NCAA national champions on your roster?  Oh, none?  How many of Austin's top 10 most eligible bachelors (see upcoming August edition of Austin Monthly)?  None again?  That's what I thought.

SUPER optimistic about the upcoming season. The themes nights are stellar, the return of the boat party is looming, and our roster is stacked. What little fat there was has been trimmed, and the lean powerhouse that remains is eager to get back on the field.  Walk of Shame up first?  Bring it on.  Starting at the end of last season we instigated an insidious 'bait and switch' scheme by cleverly losing 11-4 in the quarterfinals to the Walk of Shame which is just now coming to fruition, as Dre and the rest of the Walks have no idea what's coming.  Rest assured, something is going down tonight.  I might even Ice someone just to get us going on the right note.  UKP out!



  1. THIS is why I love you Stephen. Pure excellence.

  2. Dear Stephen,

    You must be out of your monkey ass mind...

    The score was 11-1,


  3. Dear Dre,

    Getting to punch you in the face counted for 3 runs. Hows your jaw?


  4. There needs to be a facebook so I can like that comment. A little pee came out right now.

  5. Way to start off the gmot Stephen, incredible write up! We are rooting for you tonight!! Go UKP!!!

  6. Really Jay? Really? And there will be 0 runs tonight for UKP. Sorry guys.

  7. your cowardly anonymous post says all we need to know about you.