Austin's apex predators are back and hotter than ever. Fueled by the delightful combination of grain alcohol and sugar that gives us our name; armed with our usual arsenal of glitter, tutus and tights, the men and women of PurpleSaurus Rex are ready to dance our way into your hearts and beds for another season.
If there is one thing the history of kickball has taught us it’s that PurpleSaurus Rex will not be contained. You might not hear us before you see us, but damn, what a sight to behold! If you're new to the league this year just look for the team where the men are showing just as much of their humps as the ladies; where our sexy disco dance party and Purple Punch lead to an outdoor bacchanalia that rivals Barbarella; where we playfully boo teammates with the audacity to bunt. Come share in our revelry: although we do bite, PurpleSaurus Rex welcomes all. Pants discouraged.
Veterans of Texas Live will know the drill: you've probably made out with at least one of us over the course of the last 12 months, maybe even woken up next to a sexy Purp. Apologies for the glitter, that's just how we roll. On the heels of Stephen's Carnaval sneak preview we must admit that we're feeling as sexy as ever:
Don't sleep on PurpleSaurus Rex, for we're not some children's show havin', puffy-costumed dinosaur wannabe. Join me as I turn back to the Winter 2013 season to find a Paint image from the run-up to a big clash against Awful Waffles:
That's right, past the halfway point of the season we were in second place in the standings. In the end it was a campaign that we predators raptored our way into the quarterfinals, a high-water mark for the squad on the field.
Even if our fearless leader ended up going under the maple wave in the end, we proved that "get drunk, kick away" can occasionally be a viable strategy in a game created for eight year olds.
We're fun. We're drunk. We like to make out. Like Mike Dexter, we are your role models.
Our ladies might kidnap your captain and we'll always kick away. See you on the fields, at the bar and in your beds. ANUSTART -- especially Nikki, Jessi and Matt -- you're on notice for week one as "...first priority is intimidating, distracting, and arousing them with our bodies." Optimism fills the air here in South Austin, making it the perfect time of year for a miracle or two.
Smooches and Fireball,
PurpleSaurus Rex
I see that the instant I ask others to write the GMOT our posts become filled with pictures of my nude torso. I'm flattered.
ReplyDelete