What a Capital GMOT Might Look Like

This is all speculation since I've never seen any sort of writing from most of these teams, but in lieu of ACTUAL submissions to the GMOT I've decided to make some crap up for all of you. If you feel like you're being represented unfairly then, well, write me something!

Relax and Let it Happen - Yeah, we did it again. 14 runs against a pack of scrubs like whoever it was that we played isn't even scratching the surface of the potential beat down we could have put on them, but we honestly just got bored. It was much more interesting to stare off into space and think about how awesome we are than to focus on the game, so I think I can speak for most of us when I say we were too busy giving ourselves mental HJs to be bothered with things like keeping them from scoring a few runs. We're off this week, and then we play the next team to lose to us. (Edit: Relax emailed me a writeup before I posted this, but I'm leaving this in.)

Candy Van - Actually wrote a GMOT! You go Candy Van!

Brown Chicken Brown Cow - As evidenced by our game last week, the most exciting thing that can possibly happen in kickball is a TIE. It's not easy being a tie-machine, but we make it happen. Man, LOVE ties. Too bad we're not playing this week so we can't tie somebody else.

Tyrannical Teabaggers - Try our new cocktail: the Tyrannical Sweet Teabagger. 2 parts Firefly sweet tea vodka, 1 part peach schnapps, 2 parts sprite, poured over MY BALLS.

Walk of Shame - We admit it. We are but a shadow of our former glory without Tanker. Why Tank? Why have you left us? Luckily Dre's stellar play at 1st has kept us in contention this season.

Hangers and Bangers - We didn't really understand what the deal with these seemingly semi-pro kickball teams was in weeks 2 and 3, but I can tell you now, I GET IT. Winning is flippin awesome and fun. We're gonna try doing that from now on, see how that strategy works out.

Thorz Day Ballers - Unfortunately we have a bye this week, so our next game is March 3rd.

Suck My Kick - We're generous lovers. So far this season we've sucked 14 kicks while only getting our kicks sucked 11 times. Eventually we're gonna get ours.

Dbags - Look, there's only one way to win in this league, and ... well we haven't figured out what it is yet. But when we do, WE'LL LET YOU KNOW.

Pitch Slapped -  We're like Obi Wan after Vader cuts him down in the first Death Star. (Vader = Relax). We have become more powerful than you can POSSIBLY IMAGINE. I guarantee we will not lose this week. Yes we have a bye. Shut up.

Yeah WHATEVERs - So this guy was making the Power Polls and talked some shit and we were like yeah WHATEVER.