Welcome to the Ghost Man on Third blog, the Worldwide Leader in Austin WAKA Kickball & Social Sports. Posts are player-generated, please email waka.gmot@gmail.com to contribute.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

CANDY VAN

Let's get real for a second: the ladies of CV brought it to the table in that purple-off. Tutus? Check. Glitter? Check. Tiny, adorable glittery hats? Check. Natalie in a bikini? CHECK.

In addition to all that sex appeal, the ladies did the heavy lifting in that 8-1 non-bunting game vs. PurpleSaurus.  Here are some highlights:
  • Danger burned the left fielder LIKE A BOSS.
  • Amber ran the bases like a crazy person. 
  • Carrie showed Luis how to make catching a ball look easy.
  • Natalie distracted all of the dudes at home plate AND kicked like a pro down the third base line.
  • Valerie did that douchey thing where she fielded the ball at pitcher and ran it to first base instead of throwing it to the male first basemen.
  • Hayley kicked the CRAP out of the ball against her other team.
At one point during the game, Huntley actually yelled, "let the dudes play!" because the ladies were not only bringing the offense, but they made the majority of the defensive plays. Let's be real: we may creepy, but we are also phenomenal athletes. That's right: PHENOMENAL. 

So here's to the ladies of CV. We probably looked this good doing it, too. 


Awkward.

We play the Teabaggers this week. We ain't scared. They're old news, after all, and we're still looking good wearing purple tutus while they're eating prunes to stay regular. 

BUT they ARE our friends, after all, so we want to make them feel comfortable during the creeptastic event we're going to call a kickball game on Thursday. So, you tyrannical teabagging sons (and daughters) of nice women, we want to make you a promise: we won't bring too much sexy (because we're pretttyyyyy sure James can't handle it), but we will bring these sweet, sweet 80s dance moves to you  just to make you feel like you can jump right in. (because you're old*. GET IT? DOES THE PRUNE JOKE MAKE SENSE NOW?)

Here's us just getting our warm up on:

Our obliques are very strong.

Here's Tom doing a sweet spin move after a home run:

The only thing missing is the subsequent fall after that side-to-side.

And finally, here's Hutch getting alllllll the ladies on your team pregnant:

If you're not aroused right now you might be dead.

We love you, Teabaggers. And we really can't wait to find new and interesting ways to creep you out on Thursday.

LOVE,
CANDY VAN

*FUN FACT: Most of the Teabaggers are younger than the members of Candy Van.

1 comment: