We probably should have named our team: 100% Sex Appeal.
Here's a fun fact: our first idea for a team name before we settled on Candy Van was Grimace. Why? Because we wanted to wear purple. We wanted to wear so much purple you'd think we were on the cover of Prince's next album. Purple defines who we are as a team. Sometimes we have a little romp with Purple's slutty little sister Pink, but we always come back to our sweet, sweet Purple.
I mean, think about all of the characters of color from history. This color is clearly for us.
Obviously there's this sexy mother f***er:
I'm pretty sure he'd be cheering for the Candy Vanners if he's promoting stuff like this on his show:
This is obviously how we all brush our teeth.
Let's not forget The Count:
Math is so hot right now.
This former Texas A&M Tight End:
GASTON, MOTHER F-ER.
This former cross country runner at Claremont McKenna college:
This one's for you, ladies.
You might be wondering where the previous, incredibly glorious picture came from. Purple off 2010: Candy Van v. Weekend Warriors:
We won the game and your hearts.
This is my sexy face.
There's no way to describe how great this is.
It's a Purple Off, folks. I hope Purplesaurus understands what they're up against.