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Thursday, February 9, 2017

Denver's Diary 2/6/2017- Purplesaurus Rex

Dear Diary,

At the end of 2016, I started reevaluating my life and promised myself that when 2017 rolled around I would clean up my dirty habits. You know, less sex, drugs, drinking, and more clean eating. I want to live another billion years after all!

I was determined to stick to the T-Rex Diet:

Then kickball started back up. Along with that came the copious amount of pizza, whiskey, babes, and beer.

How in the hell am I supposed to be speedo ready in a month?!

Not to mention, January and February have been jam-packed with birthdays! How do I join in on the fun when I can't party?! (Obviously the answer is to say "eff it" and party.)

Then, in a miracle that could have only happened in a galaxy far, far away, my team won a game! 

I was so excited...I peed.

Not my proudest moment, Diary. Luckily, the team didn't notice because they were too busy celebrating. *whew*


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